Arts and Entertainment

If you are getting ready for Halloween or just getting dressed in the morning, here are a few terrible superhero costumes that can teach us all a valuable lesson. 1. The Falcon The Falcon, Captain Americas sidekick, currently has a costume that fits the superhero universe just fine. However, Falcons earlier costume was entirely spandex, that exposed both his chest and his entire arms. This revealing outfit is made even more hilarious by the The Moral: Never wear a...

Weve all seen those credit card commercials on television advertising ways to keep your identity safe. They involve innocent victims of identity theft talking in the voices of the criminals who stole their identities. One includes a couple of old ladies sitting on a sofa surrounded by gaudy decorations involving flowers and doilies. While this doesnt sound so unusual, the ladies are speaking in the voices of two men who have stolen their credit cards, and possibly their ide...

Were going to attempt what, until now, seems undoable for an infidel: write about Islamic behavior in a way that doesnt upset Muslims or anybody else. Is that a challenge or isnt it? Not really. All it takes, we think with persistent resistance to despair, is unwavering fairness, inarguable logic, and adherence to the truth as best as we can know and endorse it. So here goes. These days, we hear a great deal about what Islamic and un-Islamic behavior is. While its a...

Why is President Bush unconcerned about his approval rating, which has now sunk to 33%? Hes certain its at an all-time high. How does he know? He asked his ever-faithful wife. For instance, here is the transcript of a discussion with the reliable spouse that was leaked to the press by their ever-attentive dog. Laura, Im feeling a little down today. Why, George? I guess the mood just goes with how Im feeling about my approval rating. What approval ...

Yet another bleak new book about the end of life on the earth has emerged from the darkling presses, Cormac McCarthys The Road. Unnfortunately, the author skips something that has not yet occurred: the beginning of life on earth. In the book, a father and son, who are survivors of a nuclear apocalypse, walk amid the ruins of what once was supposed to be life on earth, while other marauding survivors drift by in neo-primitive regalia, practicing such unappetizing indulgenc...

As the world indulges in another reverent obeisance to the Nobel Prize and its genuinely laudable recipients, we should take a moment to observe that Alfred Nobel has been excluded. What? Have you noticed that the prizes in science go with reliable regularity to very deserving academic researchers but, as W. S. Gilbert would say, Never," "What never?" "Well, hardly ever!" to an independent inventor. Far be it from us to protest the wonderfully groundbreaking academic r...

The Senate, immediately after voting to approve legislation governing the interrogation and overall treatment of terrorism suspects, voted on new legislation that would compel it to interrogate itself about why nearly every members speechifying has been directed, not so much at the nations problems, but at the November voter. The body very politic had good cause to approve the controversial legislation. While a dozen Democrats crossed party lines to support the legislati...

We were sitting here trying, as usual, to figure out how todays America, saddled with the burdens of inadvertent empire, could conduct itself in the world so Americans are happy about how were doing and the rest of the world might actually either approve or have a hard time disapproving of our behavior. We finally hit on an answer thats so moronic we knew right away it has real potential. We behave as if were the American Umpire, that is, we call the balls and strikes ...

One would think that the number of American lives that have been sacrificed or maimed and the enormity of American treasure that has been expended in Iraq would elicit some degree of gratitude among Iraqis. But a new poll, which was done for the University of Maryland's Program on International Policy Attitudes, proves that its hard to be grateful when you could be blown up or otherwise assassinated at any moment. Here are a few absences of gratitude that the Bush adminis...

As all the world now knows, Berlins Deutsche Opera closed a production of Mozarts perennially harmless opera Idomeneo, because of incalculable risk due to a threat from a Muslim group or individual over the directors decision to include a scene in which the heads of Mohammed, Jesus, and Budda are presented without their accompanying bodies. The heady scene is reportedly an effort on the part of the director to mix opera with his own anti-religious sentiments. While ...